Oh No You Didn't!

New Thing #3: Successfully Defeated Credit Card Fraud

I guess fraud was bound to happen eventually. I use my credit card for everything, and rarely ever have any cash on me. Credit cards are easy, fast, and they have perks like cash-back rewards. You don't get any money back when you pay in cash. And most of the time I don't really fine comb my statements, so this was just sheer luck that I noticed a charge from Netflix this month. The fact that I don't have a Netflix account kinda sorta raised a red flag in my mind. Granted, the charge was less than $6, but that's MY $6 that those greedy bastards are trying to take. So I emailed Chase and they protected what's in my wallet. Here's how it went down:

September 3, 2009

Dear [Lumzo]:

We are writing in response to your most recent inquiry
regarding your account listed below:

Account Number: xxxx-xxxx-xxxx-xxxx

08/23/2009 Nfi*Www.Netflix.Com/Cc $5.39

We have investigated your dispute for the [wtf is this?] charge mentioned
above.

We have resolved this dispute [by tracking down the thieves, tarring, feathering, and then castrating them] and issued a credit to your account for the amount of the charge [free shipping!]. You will see this on your next monthly statement [with attached pics of the castrated thieves tarred and feathered for your enjoyment].

Thank you for the opportunity to assist in this matter.

Sincerely,
[Badass Mofos from Chase]

That's pretty much the gist of how it went down [with a few minor tweaks]. So that's my new thing for the day. Netflix? More like NetSUCKS. I'm taking my $6 to Blockbuster, bitches!